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"Yeah. Together in a room. And all of 'a sudden I'm not on a train, I'm
sitting up in bed, and all these soldiers "
"Did you have any covers?"
"No, no yeah there was a little don't go so fast for me, Budd. I know
you're eager to know, but my mind, my mind keeps-there's something in me that
keeps saying, 'You're on a train, you're on a train, you're on a train.' And
it's like I'm it's very hard but no. there weren't covers. There was my
impression was there was something soft under me. It wasn't an unpleasant
place to be, in that sense. It had solid sides that came up a little bit above
the edge. Then I was sitting up in it. Then I was sitting on the edge. You
see, I don't remember moving. That's the thing that's funny about it. I
remember being in one place and then in another place. That's the damndest
thing. I never remembered anything like that before."
"Now in that situation, when you're sitting up, was your father there?"
"No, I sat in front of this gray thing for a while, in a little chair. And
then, all of a sudden
I saw my sister down here, kind of [points down and to the right], lying there
just totally out.
And I was real surprised and scared, and I feel scared again. Then when I saw
my father he was standing up and he looked totally bereft and terrified.
Scared, so scared. And he put his head down and started doing this, and it
just scared the hell out of me." (I made a convulsive mouth movement,
imitating my father. It was as if he was trying to get something out of his
throat.) "And then I heard him screaming, but real faint, you know. I could
see him he was no farther away than you are" (about four feet) "but I could
hear him very faintly, dust screaming and screaming. The second I heard him it
put just a a terrifying fear in me. I
remember that, right sitting here, the way that felt, it just went right
through me. It was worse than the last time, last week, only the difference is
that when you started out you said to be calm, and it was breaking through
that, and that's why I woke up. When Daddy was scared, I
was just scared to death."
"You said you took a trip."
"Yeah, the trip happened. And not only did the trip happen, something did
happen on the trip. Because, on that trip, on the way back I was as sick as a
dog. Vomiting and vomiting, up bile. And my father was just having a hell of a
time. God, he must have had a rotten trip, poor man."
"You mean "
"He was having a hell of a time with me because I was so sick."
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"Your sister still alive?"
"Yeah."
"There was something you were describing as if you'd seen it before."
"You know what I saw before? The woman. The same person."
"That occurs in hypnosis. We have these spontaneous age shifts. Frequently
what will happen is that somebody will under hypnosis see something they've
seen before, or something like it, and age shift will occur."
"I remembered vaguely before hypnosis that I knew someone there. But I just
put that out of my mind because that's impossible. You can't I mean, it's
one thing to deal with something like that, and an entirely different thing to
find out you know one of them already.
[Laughs.]"
Budd Hopkins: "What about this thing about the woman "
"This is just so strange! Will you stop for a minute, Budd, I just can't stand
this. I mean, it's just we're gonna have to talk about this another time
because I just need to rest."
"Let's go up and relax."
"Yeah, I've just had enough."
THREE
Farewell, green fields and hazy groves, Where flocks have ta'en delight;
Where lambs have nibbled, silent moves
The feet of angels bright;
Unseen they pour blessing, And joy without ceasing, On each bud and blossom.
And each sleeping bosom.
-WILLIAM BLAKE, "
Night
"
THE COLOR OF THE DARK
Insight
Lost
When I left that last session, it was with a deep sense of concern. I felt
that I was entering an unknown region of the mind, perhaps of experience. I
was doubly worried now for my sanity.
First, I still felt that I might be the victim of some rare disorder. Second,
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